.anything two-wheels, travel, food, beauty, fashion and my personal musings.

Beauty is fair.

I have recently been on a work trip for a familiarization tour of the Company’s business in Vietnam. During one of our corporate dinners, a local contact I have had frequent tele-conference encounters with but have never met, exclaimed to me upon our first face-to-face introduction, “Are you Malaysian?? You are so dark-skinned!” I believe she met to ask if I was indeed of Malay descent instead.

Initially, I was rather taken aback by her candidness as I generally thought it had come across as rather rude to discuss race a the dinner table among colleagues and work associates. I had to quickly respond graciously (and hide my embarrassment) with, “Oh, yes, I know I am rather tanned for a Singaporean lady. But yes, I am Chinese.”

In all honesty, I had just interpreted her response as, “Oh, you are ugly!” You see, since that encounter a few days back, I’ve started to pay more attention to how fair-skinned most of my Singaporean counterparts are. And although I have known that being fair is rated rather high on beauty scales, it only finally hit me how being fair-skinned is considered the epitome of beauty here among Asians.

I am therefore, not considered beautiful as I have medium-toned skin.

I am addicted to watching YouTube videos especially beauty tutorials and product reviews. In these videos, I have seen how Caucasian women love being tanned skin instead of appearing pale and pasty. And women of colour seem to carry off bright neon hues. I was convinced it was great to be in the middle with medium-toned skin as then I had the best of both worlds.

Boy, was I wrong!

“You are so dark-skinned!” Again, this looped in my head like a broken record. So much so, I started to thought-circle and get rather depressed. I mean, who doesn’t want to be considered beautiful??? Then, I had a eureka moment: Is validation so important to me that I live my life according to other people’s view or ranking of me?

So now, I am likened to think that beauty is as fair-weathered friends are: few and unimportant. What I mean by that is while it’s nice to labelled beautiful and good-looking, I am fine with not ranking high on that scale because I value self-love over self-loathe; and being a person with good values and having strong family bonds and a few close friends are more important to me. That, and living a full life. And, I can appreciate beauty if I am staring it in the face.

So, I think I merely had a moment of weakness there. Here’s some food for thought: is beauty skin deep to you? Or would you rank inner beauty higher?

Here’s a picture of me on the plane. Yup, I’m not fair but I am beautiful as God’s child and that’s more than enough for me.



6 comments on “Beauty is fair.

  1. DrVara
    November 16, 2013

    Yes you are BEAUTIFUL indeed

  2. isaac976
    November 17, 2013

    Who say’s tan is not high on the beauty scale… fair people looks like some dead body that has no blood in them. Who said that to you.. lemme at her / him .. such a person with low taste !! #RAGE !!!

    • spattiselanno
      November 17, 2013

      Haha, thanks for your support. But I have learnt not to take her comments to heart. We are all beautiful. šŸ™‚

  3. Everyday Power
    November 20, 2013

    Super thoughtful! Great work!

  4. J
    December 9, 2013

    You are exotic. Beauty, like perfume, can only be defined by an individual’s preference and perception, when you get up close and personal. It is the energy (positive or negative – it either attracts or repels) that adorn a person’s beauty, and that is quite indefinable. For instance, Chanel No.5 is the reigning beauty (I disagree) in terms of scent; some people are just incorruptible in terms of what the world thinks. Being gracious to ignorant folks is one, letting go and loving yourself, that’s divine. Glad I found your blog.

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This entry was posted on November 16, 2013 by in Life & Thoughts and tagged , , , , , , .
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